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Peter Rogers's Blog
Artist-in-Residence at Chez Firth

Friday (4/24/09) 6:59pm - ... wherein Peter writes a sketch for Friday Sketch War.

This week's Friday Sketch War theme is "Radio Drama."

Side note:  I'm always a little iffy on how to format audiodrama.  I like to use a bastardized screenplay format that's mostly dialog, SFX (for sound effects), and MUSIC (for music cues).  Hopefully it reads okay.

(Additional side note:  this idea originated here.)

               Sketch War
               Radio Drama Edition
               "Raoul and Dave Confuse the World, Episode 25"

               FADE IN:  

               MUSIC:  Introductory music.

                                   NARRATOR 
                         And now, the further adventures of
                         everyone's favorite globe-trotting
                         performance artists!  It's time for
                         "Raoul and Dave Confuse the World!"

               MUSIC:  Ominous music.

                                   NARRATOR 
                         Last week, in the final moments of
                         their Azyrian mission, Raoul and
                         Dave were captured by the beautiful
                         but-deadly Lieutenant Razzen.

               RAZZEN speaks precise but faintly accented English.  A femme
               fatale type.

                                   RAZZEN
                         So.  Raoul and Dave.  At last, I
                         see the terrorists face-to-face.

                                   DAVE
                         We're not terrorists.

                                   RAOUL
                         Unless we're terrorists of the
                         mind!  Blowing up your complacency! 
                         With art!

                                   DAVE
                         Raoul, seriously:  stop. 
                         Lietenant, we're not a threat.

                                   RAZZEN
                         You were responsible for the
                         balloon animals in Mogadishu, yes?

                                   RAOUL
                         Maybe.

                                   RAZZEN
                         ... and the fake Northern Lights in
                         Venezuela?

                                   RAOUL
                         That was pretty cool.

                                   DAVE
                         But it never hurt anybody!

                                   RAZZEN
                         It was very silly!

                                   RAOUL
                         Thanks!

                                   RAZZEN
                         Our regime does not abide
                         silliness.  Whatever you were
                         plotting here, the Great Leader
                         would not approve.

               SFX:  A switchblade clicks open.

                                   RAOUL
                         Ahhh that's a knife!

                                   NARRATOR 
                         Meanwhile, Dave employs his stage
                         magic skills to slip out of his
                         ropes and deploy a smoke grenade!

               SFX:  FOOM!

               Everyone coughs.

                                   RAOUL
                         Quick, untie me!

                                   RAZZEN
                         You'll never get away with this!

               SFX:  Alarms sound.

               SFX:  Racing footsteps echo down a hallway.

                                   NARRATOR
                         Our heroes escape from the complex,
                         with one short side trip.

                                   DAVE
                         Wait!

                                   RAOUL
                         But -- knife lady!

                                   DAVE
                         That room has our stuff.

               SFX:  A door opens.

                                   DAVE
                         There's the activator!  Just hit
                         the red button.

               SFX:  Beep!

                                   RAOUL
                         I did it!  So... we won?

                                   GUARD
                             (muffled)
                         I think they went this way!

                                   DAVE
                         We gotta get out of here first.

                                   NARRATOR 
                         Meanwhile, across Azyria, the
                         machines that Dave and Raoul
                         carefully set in place each
                         receives the signal and turned
                         themselves on.

               SFX:  Street noise and chatter.

                                   SON
                         So the sky isn't really blue?

               SFX:  A loud click and a whirr.

                                   DAD
                         Son, it's actually something called
                         Rayleigh scattering, and --

               SFX:  POP!

                                   SON
                         What's that?

               SFX:  POP!  POP!

                                   DAD
                         What's what?

               SFX:  Millions of pops!

               SFX:  The background chatter turns into 'oohs' and 'aahs'.

                                   SON
                         Bubbles!  Lots of bubbles!

                                   DAD
                         Wow.

               SFX:  General laughter and merriment

                                   NARRATOR 
                         And so, as Azyria's cities are
                         filled will millions of iridescent
                         soap bubbles, our heroes emerge
                         from one of the compound's escape
                         tunnels, only to find...

               SFX:  Heavy door creaks open.

               SFX:  Helicopter rotors.

                                   RAOUL
                         A helicopter?

                                   HELICOPTER MAN
                         Get in!

               SFX:  Raoul and Dave clamber into the helicopter.

               SFX:  The helicopter door shuts.

               SFX:  The rotors speed up as the 'copter takes off.

                                   RAOUL
                         Wait.  You guys aren't from the
                         USPAA.

                                   HELICOPTER MAN
                         Nope.

                                   DAVE
                         Azyrians?

                                   HELICOPTER MAN
                         Ha, no.

                                   RAOUL
                         Who are you?

               An old ITALIAN MAN clears his throat.

                                   ITALIAN MAN
                         We're with the Pope.

               MUSIC:  Dramatic chords!

               MUSIC:  Closing music.

                                   NARRATOR
                         Will our heroes escape the clutches
                         of the Azyrian forces?  Will
                         aiborne soap bubbles blow Azyria's
                         collective mind?  And what shadowy
                         purpose does the Vatican have
                         planned for Raoul and Dave?

               MUSIC:  Closing music gets louder.

                                   NARRATOR
                         Find out in the next installment of
                         "Raoul and Dave Confuse the World!"

                                                              FADE OUT.


(I've cross-posted this to the Sketchwar site.)

Tags: , , ,
Mood: [mood icon] relieved (finished another one!) · Music: none
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Comments:

[User Picture]
From:happywaffle
Date:Saturday (4/25/09) 10:02am
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*applause*
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[User Picture]
From:hujhax
Date:Sunday (4/26/09) 9:30am
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*bows*
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